Sunday, December 28, 2008
Luckily, i didn't take away my blogger.
Alright, i'm just being selfish!
Wanted to have the best of both side.
I meant wordpress and blogger.
Anyway, nobody read this..
(feeling dumb, because nobody reads this)
Just wanna tell those who stumble on here
Merrryyy~ Christmas! (belated one luh!)
and
HAPPY NEW YEAR :D
I think blogging is a venting outlet for me.
And this explains the emo and angry posts that i have been posting.
As well as happy ones!
I feel much better when i blogged everything out.
At least someone here is taking my explanation and yea.
I'm free (till a certain extend) to say whatever i like.
Aiya, i am sad again luh.
Because i realised i've been doing personality test and horoscope to know myself better.
and it's bad. very bad.
Not a right way to know what am i feeling.
I feel lost, 茫然
at a loss, i dont know what is happening to me.
The mixed feelings just came rushing to me.
and i am over sensitive to things beside me.
(This explains why that i had lost my cool alot of times to my manager)
(I know i am naughty luh! i feel very bad already)
My chest feels so tight.
Till i thought something bad will happen.
I dont know.
New year is coming.
And i am not excited about it.
So unlike me..
P.S I have a little secret to share.
These few days, i had alot of panic attacks.
I woke up dreaming or day-dreaming that the world is coming to an end.
Yes, i am very afraid.
For the first time i am so afraid of eating, bathing, taking public transportation, and as well as now (using computer).
Recession hit us already.
And the reason is? Fuel.
Fossil fuel to be exact.
China already built nuclear plants so that they no need to be so dependent on fuel.
I am getting paranoid. You can say why am i feeling so down now.
(i know that there's no use worrying)
Ok ok. This is partially the reason why i am walking to so many places =.=
Not exercising, i know i am fat but i walked because i need to walk my worries off.
call me crazy.
I've walked from my house to east coast rd, those bungalows there. (even though i love to have one of those ;p )
I've walked from my house to pasir ris dog farm.
I've walked to tamp interchange.
Okay. i live in tampines.
But it's just that, WHO WANT TO JOIN ME FOR WALKING?!!?!?!?!?
tell me OK! ;p
feels bored to walk along.
and my mum is the victim that was being pulled along by me.
heehee.
i love you mummy ;p
help
3:21 AM
Thursday, October 23, 2008
I am not EVIL.
But I don't wish you well, neither :)
help
7:57 PM
Monday, October 13, 2008
I feel giddy, nausea, frustrated, aches everywhere especially my HEAD and whatever that doesnt feel right.
The medication HAS terrible SIDE-EFFECTS.
Fucking MED. and why AM I STILL fucking eating it?
I'm not letting this to STOP my life and then start depending on the stupid capsules.
Yes, the blue and transparent capsule that make me feel so fucked up.
until i almost broke down today.
Argh, I have fucking lousy determination.
Whatever, i need to get a life.
I need to get over the pills.
They sucks.
I'm so gonna throw it away;
INTO the TOILET BOWL
INTO the PEOPLE's WATER BOTTLE THAT I HATE.
INTO the DRAIN!
INTO the SINK!!!!!!!
Where is my used to be confidence?
COME BACK COME BACK!
09oct08 - my "Birthday" :D
I need to love myself !!!!
help
8:38 PM
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Your view on yourself:
You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.
The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.
Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.
The seriousness of your love:
Your have very sensible tactics when approaching the opposite sex. In many ways people find your straightforwardness attractive, so you will find yourself with plenty of dates.
Your views on education:
Education is less important than the real world out there, away from the classroom. Deep inside you want to start working, earning money and living on your own.
The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.
How do you view success:
You are confident that you will be successful in your chosen career and nothing will stop you from trying.
What are you most afraid of:
You are concerned about your image and the way others see you. This means that you try very hard to be accepted by other people. It's time for you to believe in who you are, not what you wear.
Who is your true self:
You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.
http://www.quizbox.com/personality/test82.aspx
I take this test here !
You guys can go and try :D
Labels: Is it true?
help
10:20 PM
I think I'm a super cry baby;
I just realised that..
When my pay was given out "wrongly" on a super happy friday night;
I cried, because the total pay was less than $140 when it should be around $300 plus and my total bills that i have to pay is more than $180.
I cried even more when my work manager treat me unfairly comparing to a stupid A&G girl while complaining to my colleague about how stupid is that girl.
I cried like mad when my another manager and colleague wanted to cheer me up by buying me MacDonald and Gelare ice cream.
I cried non-stop that day or i mean, that night.
Yes, that sinister NIGHT!
And I guess I scared away a super cute (& tall!) crew cabin, because I was serving him with two big watery red eyes.
Despite all my crying, I can't even sleep that day.
Well, I did sleep for a few hours but it was TOTALLY insufficent for the night shift later on..
(later on = which is on Saturday night).
I was rolling here and there in my bed.
Terrible day to sleep..
And when i see my bills, I want to cry again. =.=
I guess my eye water tap isn't fixed properly on that stupid day.
Albeit all the reasons they gave me, like changing the cut-off date of my pay,
I still feel very very very UNSATISFIED with their explanations!
Should they do anything about our pay, they first must inform us and not act on their free will!
I mean, this is a standard thing to do what..
RAHHHHH :( !!!!
I HATE THEM FOR DELAYING MY PAY!
Tml having UT and I can't sleep even though I asked LEK to go sleep.
Haiyo..
I need money lah!
I HATE MY COMPANY =.=
Like, i so hate them for making me cry and delaying my pay!
ARGHHHH :(
I may not be right all the times, but at least I don't try to be wrong on purpose..
Zzzzzzz.. going to sleep le =(
help
12:12 AM
Monday, October 6, 2008
An idle mind is a devil's playground.
Talked about so many stuffs.
And i've seen through LIFE matters.
I guess even if we can't move on;
we have to; have to
no matter what, crawl through the fire and find a exit.
And maybe then we can know that,
there's actually a lot of ways to solve the problem.
And maybe by crawling out of the fire is better than rushing through the smoke that the fire produced.
What do you think?
Have you in any moment in your life regretted doing something that you shouldn't do?
Well, we shouldn't.
Because it's our regrets that formed us a better man.
We should learn how to love our regrets.
Regrets are part of our upbringing, they let you become a stronger person. (:
Jin Min, jiayou :D
Labels: jiayou hao ma :D
help
1:25 PM
Friday, October 3, 2008
I hate the before-rain smell...
It got the distinctive smell of that day when we were caught in the rain together.
I hate the rain.
help
8:26 PM
